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The Social Network: the kink meme!

It's Complicated: But sexy!

Mark Zuckerberg
The Sarcastic Kitty oresteia wrote in tsn_kinkmeme
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[PART NINE] & Some News
Okay, I'm a little new at this so sorry if I mess this up first go. Because it's been 5 months since the last round even though we haven't been busy. I figured I might as well earn my keep and try to get this place alive again...




IMPORTANT: please DO NOT post prompts about any non-public people as part of a prompt. for example: randi zuckerberg is fine as she is a public figure both on the internet and on facebook itself. priscilla chan is NOT as she is not a public figure.

if you're in doubt, please message the mod or leave a comment in the discussion post.

♥ post requests and responses in the comments to this post.
♥ be respectful.
♥ both a pairing/character AND a prompt/kink must be posted.
♥ one pairing/prompt per comment please.
♥ you are encouraged to try and write a prompt for every request you make.
♥ we are slash, femslash, het, three-and-moresomes etc. friendly. (we are even incest friendly what with some of our characters being twins and all...)
♥ no pairing bashing, OK? no need to wank over ships.
♥ long and short fics welcome. multiple responses encouraged!
♥ please try to refrain from saying 'seconded!' as much as possible.
♥ on RPF: Please disclaim that it is RPF, a work of fiction and in no way related to the actual actors/persons/etc. (i wouldn't even try and discourage RPF from this meme ;))


♥ alphabetize pairings/threesomes/moresomes. (e.g. Eduardo/Mark/Sean etc.)
♥ put [RPF] before RPF prompts. (e.g. [RPF] Andrew/Jesse)
♥ for crossover prompts: "[Crossover], The Social Network Character(s)/Other Character(s), [Fandom]" (e.g. [Crossover], Eduardo/Columbus, [Zombieland])
♥ no "!" in pairings, only in descriptions. (e.g. Eduardo/Mark, FacebookCreator!Eduardo, CFO!Mark)
♥ anyone, everyone, no one? Use "Other." (e.g. Sean/Other)
♥ Please do not repost prompts from earlier rounds
♥ put [GEN] before GEN prompts.


♥ please don't embed. link to images/videos.
♥ no locked material. this includes communities, even if membership is open.
♥ fills can be posted anonymously or not.
♥ fills can be anything: fic, art, vid, fanmix, podfic, etc.
♥ all prompts are open to fills at all times, even if they have been filled in the past or are being currently filled by someone else. multiple fills are positively encouraged; if something appeals to you then do not be put off creating a new fill by the existence of a prior one.
NEW: ♥ PLEASE comment with the first of your fill to the PROMPT and then all future updates as a comment to the FIRST PART of the fill. this makes it easier for both the WIP spreadhseet and for archiving stuff on delicious. it also helps people who are trying to catch up on updates and don't have to look through every fill on the prompt (should it have more than one). thank you.

Hi, right now everyone is working on some changes so hold on new things are coming. In an effort to kick this place back into action, we're doing round 9. In a few days, we'll be setting up a fills post that hopefully will work directly for archiving and an overflow post. Also we'll be doing a friending meme at tsn_km_gather so be looking out for that. I know some of the other mods have plans of their own which will be coming soon.

If you have any questions or ideas that I can help you with, feel free to PM me. I'll be around.



have fun!

THERE WILL BE UNMARKED SPOILERS. enter at your own risk! :D


i know you guys are enjoying this meme and i appreciate that but please can you put the SUBJECT HEADER on your prompt. you would REALLY be helping me out if you could do that. it just saves time for me when i'm trying to tag everything in delicious.



AND PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT repost prompts from parts three, four, five, six, seven, or eight. the delicious is around for people to find prompts they may not have already seen. We know there's been some issues but we're working on it with pinboard. No duplicates from this round either. THANK YOU.

Jesse/Andrew-Easy A-AU

Easy A-AU! Jesse pretends to be a slut to help out a friend. Let's say it's Emma and she was trying to trick people into thinking she wasn't interested in girls, or specifically Carey Mulligan. Things go horribly wrong when other people ask for help and he just sort of goes with it. He's a bit ostracized. Andrew is intrigued and knows Jesse isn't really the way people are saying. He and Andrew flirt around eachother in school and Jesse thinks Andrew is just trying to be a friend. Andrew eventually asks Jesse on a date and Jesse assumes it's for fake slutty services, but it's not and there is flailing and a bit of angst and eventually love.

Re: Jesse/Andrew-Easy A-AU

can i write you a separate emma/carey ficlet? lmaoooooo omg i can see it already, emma mooning spectacularly over qt and confused carey who doesn't know what to do when emma stares at her derpily.

Re: Jesse/Andrew-Easy A-AU

I would definitely love that! Carey would be totally sweet but confused, and Emma would just flirt awkwardly forever, ugh they're both so adorable.

[fill] rumour has it, 1a/?

i have no idea how long this is going to be and really i should be working on my other wip, but i can’t resist this prompt!

title from adele's rumour has it, warning for some homophobic slurs in part 1b

There’s a funny thing about rumors: they spread. No matter how anonymous and invisible you are to the rest of the world, if there’s even the slightest, most irrelevant rumor about you circulating, you can guarantee that people you’ve never even spoken to have heard it. Justin from chemistry and Mila from Spanish have been hooking up? Yep, whole school knows. The football captain got suspended for a week over a weed brownie? Even the junior high kids down the street are buzzing about it on the way home from the bus stop. Jesse and Andrew kissed at Brenda Song’s birthday party freshman year? The story’s so old that there are about fifteen versions, all with dubious validity, bouncing around different social circles.

The real, honest-to-God truth is that no, Andrew and Jesse did not, in fact, kiss at Brenda’s fifteenth, or any other time before or after that. The real story is much less interesting and only actually known by the two of them: a rigged game of Spin the Bottle wherein Carey had discreetly blown Andrew’s flimsy Sprite bottle away from herself and over in Jesse’s direction, after which Brenda had squealed and shoved the two of them into her bedroom where Andrew had frowned a lot and stared at his hands before saying, “Can I tell you something?” with big, gleaming brown eyes.

And Jesse couldn’t say no to those eyes so he nodded and sat on Brenda’s bed while Andrew sat next to him.

“I’ve never been kissed.”

Jesse remembers being confused because how on Earth had a boy like Andrew have lived almost fifteen years without some girl just grabbing him and planting a big one on those perpetually smiling lips, but nodding anyway. “Neither have I.”

And Andrew had exhaled and grinned and flopped back and said, “Then you’ll get it, right? I want my first kiss to be… unplanned. Or something. I don’t want to walk out of here in five minutes and have Brenda squeal in my ear over a completely unromantic lack of privacy in a pink bedroom.”

Jesse had nodded and laid back next to him. They were friends, good enough that the proximity wasn’t awkward, though the conversation might have been.

“Is it, um, y’know… okay if we don’t kiss and just say we did?” Andrew was frowning again and his eyes were big and nervous, so of course Jesse had agreed.

But if you asked anyone on the other side of that door, they’d tell you, oh yeah, they totally made out.

[fill] rumour has it, 1b/?

That was four years ago, though, and nobody really cares about that rumor, so neither does Jesse. The idiots who used to shout “fag” and “fairy boy” at him when he walked past them in the hallway lost interest when they realized that Jesse was excellent at ignoring their homophobic bullshit, and he quickly fell back under the high school radar.

Andrew wasn’t so lucky at first, always staring at his shoes when the morons greeted him with a “sup, Brokeback?” for the first two years of high school and once frowning at Jesse while he put his books back in his locker, saying, “Maybe my idea wasn’t so great after all.” But he bounced back. People stopped caring and accepted him, started cheering for him after he’d finish a school play.

…Which is precisely what’s going on one Friday night, the opening night of A Funny Thing Happened On the Way to the Forum, Andrew playing the perfect Hero, flailing and goofy, causing Joe to crack up laughing by Jesse’s side the entire time.

“He’s ridiculous,” Jesse says with a gentle smile when Andrew steps up to bow at the front of the stage.

Joe hmms about it for a minute before he laughs and says, “Yeah, but you know you’d still totally do him.”

Jesse rolls his eyes and Joe actually yanks him out of his seat by his sleeve until they’re out of the theater, to beat the post-play traffic. “And you’re ridiculous too. You’re a match made in heaven, you know.”

It’s the most ludicrous thing Jesse’s ever heard, because if Andrew actually thought they were a good match, he’d do more than innocently flirt with him between classes, but Jesse kind of likes it that way. He’s nearly eighteen and he’s still never even had his first kiss, so he’s not too keen on even trying to start a relationship right now, not until he figures out what his feelings towards Andrew even are. (And anyway, he’s allegedly been pining over Shannon from their English class, but y’know, rumor mill and all.)

“You’re doing it again,” Joe groans, leaning against the side of his shitty orange 1989 VW Beetle. When Jesse gives him a quizzical look, he continues, “The thing where you get this far-away look like your internal monologue is too loud for you to focus on the outside world. Get the hell in the car, man, my mom said you should stay the night. She’s making waffles.”

The thing is, the Mazzello family is sort of… weirdly open about everything, so “making waffles” could mean anything, including some pretty fucked up mental images that are now uncomfortably swimming through Jesse’s mind.


“I, erm…” Jesse tries to think up a quick excuse, but his mind runs blank. “Have a… thing. You know, like… a thing to do. So important, can’t even spare time for a waffle, I’ll bum a ride home off of Patrick! Thanks, dude, like, a lot. Maybe next time?”

Joe’s not an idiot, he can clearly tell Jesse’s lying, but he says nothing but, “Do your thing, man, just know you’re missing out on some fucking awesome waffles.”

Jesse scurries away into the streetlamp-lit parking lot. He doesn’t bum a ride off of Patrick, because Patrick isn’t even there to bum one off of, and he doesn’t have a thing to do this weekend, unless that thing is prancing around his bedroom singing “Lovely” from the soundtrack of the play he’d just seen (and maybe pretending that Andrew was singing with him, if you really must know).

Re: [fill] rumour has it, 1b/?

asdlkndlkfg jessseeee. ahahaha his version of pocket full of sunshine would be a song from a play :D

so excited for this fill ♥

Re: [fill] rumour has it, 1b/?

i am ridiculously excited about this.

[fill] rumour has it, 2a/?

hi my name is anon and emma/copious profanity is my otp

“Tell me about your thing.”

It’s Monday and Joe still hasn’t let the thing thing go. He’s smirking knowingly while he and Jesse wander down the hall before chemistry.

“That’s disgusting, Joe, I don’t want to talk about my dick,” Jesse shoots back, proud of himself for the snarky remark until Joe smacks him, actually smacks him in the face.

Why is he best friends with him?

Jesse’s certain that Joe won’t shut the hell up until he gets some sort of answer that’s better than “I sang show tunes with my cat”. “It was nothing, really.”

Joe raises an eyebrow when they walk into the classroom. “Nothing, really? Doesn’t sound like nothing to me.”

“I only said four words. What could that possibly sound like?”

Joe settles into his side of the lab bench. “You got all flustered, don’t deny it! Jesse had a date.”

There’s no point in denying it, no matter how untrue it is, because no matter what Jesse says, Joe’s going to assume it was a date anyway. The bell rings and class begins.

“Yeah, sure. I was out on a date.”

Joe squirms in his seat while the teacher passes out quizzes. “Spill! Details, dude, details. Guy or girl? Hot or not? Crazy for going on a date with you and not me?”

So Jesse fabricates yet another story off of the top of his head, just to get him off his back. Erica, he invents, is a girl who goes to the community college a few minutes from his house. She’s cute and funny and has a nice sense of humor. No, Joe, he’s not eternally in love with her and no, Joe, they probably won’t have a second date and no, Joe, he’s not insane, he just wasn’t that interested once all was said and done.

That shuts him up for half of the quiz, but once Jesse’s finished the section on distinguishing positive and negative ions, Joe murmurs, “So did you have sex with her?”

Jesse chokes on air and splutters and the teacher’s glare goes unseen as Jesse near-shouts, “Fuck off, Joe, we did not have sex!” and Joe laughs and laughs and says, “Dude, you totally had sex!”

Right in the middle of class.

And Jesse really needs to find a new best friend.

Because Joe will be murdered very soon.

The teacher, Mr. Ainsley, stands up and glowers at the two of them. “Eisenberg, Mazzello! Principal’s office, now!”

And they leave the class, Joe laughing and Jesse definitely not laughing, while the students behind them start to whisper, “Little Virgin Jesse finally lost his v-card.”


[fill] rumour has it, 2b/?

The principal sees Joe first because it’s not exactly his first time to the office and he already knows what to expect, so Jesse sits outside before he’s joined by another person, a tall, skinny girl he can’t quite see the face of because there’s a large wad of bloody tissues pressed against her nose, obscuring her features. When he glances up to check again, he sees the flowing auburn waves and recognizes one Emma Stone.

He gives her a sympathetic smile because he sort of knows her, if only as the girl Joe occasionally has zombie movie marathons with. She groans when she sits down, rubbing at the swollen bridge of her nose.

“What are you in for?” Emma asks, muffled by the ball of tissues.

Jesse shrugs. “I yelled at Joe to fuck off during a quiz. You?”

“That’s it? You pussy,” she chuckles. “Alan Dorn called me a dyke.”

Jesse recalls yet another tale from the rumor mill, one that included Emma drunkenly proclaiming her love for Carey, Andrew’s friend, the cute pixie-looking blonde who had moved the bottle during that fateful Spin the Bottle game. He frowns. “And you ended up in the principal’s office with a bloody nose?”

Emma’s grinning beneath her hand. “I kicked him in the balls and this asshole’s fat fucking fist goes rogue because he’s a little bitch and it smacks me in the face. He got off scuff-free, but at least I got the satisfaction of making him cry.”

Jesse lets out an entertained laugh. “He cried?”

Emma nods proudly. “Like a blubbering little baby. ‘Stone, you fucking muff diver, I can’t believe you’d do that, wah-wah, I’m a whiny douchebag’.”

“Shit, more power to you.”

Emma grins again, but it falters and turns into a frown. “Does it get better? The insults?”

Jesse frowns. “What?”

“I mean… you went through this, didn’t you? All those gay rumors when you and Andrew kissed?”

“We didn’t—” He splutters, then mumbles, “We never actually kissed.”

“Oh.” Emma’s lips form around the word and she frowns even deeper.

“Are you actually— I mean, do you—”

Emma snorts a little bit. “Gay? Like Carey? Yeah. I guess I just don’t want the entire world to know?”

Jesse understands because it happens to be his exact problem. He likes boys, he does, but is it the entire school’s business? No, and he doesn’t want anyone to know because it’s his life, and really, it’s probably why he told Joe that his alleged date had been an Erica, as opposed to an Eric. Or a Steve or a John or an Andrew. Or whatever.

“Maybe we’re not so different, Stone.”

Emma smiles, crinkles her nose before grimacing in pain. She punches him lightly in the arm with her free hand just before Jesse gets called into the office.

Re: [fill] rumour has it, 2b/?

this is the best, and Emma/profanity has got to be the ultimate OTP ;D

Re: [fill] rumour has it, 2b/?

oh my god
this is just
i am so excited for the direction this is going in
and it's so clever
and i love your voices, like how jesse isn't 100% shrinking violet and emma isn't quirky to the max--they're acting like real people!

Re: [fill] rumour has it, 2b/?

I am loving this.

Author? Hello? - (Anonymous), 2012-04-03 02:20 pm (UTC)(Expand)
author!anon here! - (Anonymous), 2012-04-06 07:09 pm (UTC)(Expand)
Re: author!anon here! - rrrg, 2012-04-07 05:42 am (UTC)(Expand)

[fill] rumour has it, 3a/?

hi omg i am awful and i need to have proper updating etiquette hammered into my head but i have PLANS and whatnot now.
thank you guys so much for the comments *___* especially the characterization one because i was so nervous about that! i wanted to make a sort of jesse-olive hybrid because fandom!jesse is definitely not the kind of person to do an easy a sort of thing and aslfsda i just hope that it works out.


Jesse gets off with a warning because it’s his first time in trouble. Joe, saddled with a week of after-school detention, isn’t so lucky, and neither is Emma, who received the same fate, so on Friday, immediately after the last bell rings, Jesse has no ride home. Perfect. He wanders around the patch of grass across from the football field, trying to get enough cell phone signal to call his mom, but he stops when a gentle hand touches his shoulder.

“Hey Jess!” Andrew greets when Jesse turns around, fed up with his lack of service. Andrew’s eyes are big and warm, his lips curled into a large smile. He stretches a freckled, sun-gold arm around Jesse’s shoulders like it’s the most natural thing he’s ever done. “I was about to head home until I saw you looking like an adorable, sad puppy. What’s up?”

Jesse’s face goes unnaturally warm and no, this is not what’s supposed to happen. He’s supposed to be shooting witty comments Andrew’s way like usual, but to be honest, he does actually kind of feel like a sad puppy. A sad, flattered, blushing puppy with a cute boy’s arm around him.


He shrugs. “My ride home has after school detention.”

Andrew pauses, scrunches up his eyes and mouth while he thinks. “Hey, I’ve got nothing going on, I’ll give you a ride!”

And that’s how Jesse winds up in his car, smiling at him from the passenger seat as Andrew drives down the road gleefully half-singing, half-screaming Kanye West with the windows rolled down so his hair whips around his head. Jesse’s sure he doesn’t look quite so graceful—the wind usually turns his curls into an unfortunate frizzy bush on top of his head, but he doesn’t complain because Andrew seems to be genuinely enjoying himself.

“C’mon, Jess,” he coaxes as they pull up to a stoplight, nudging Jesse’s shoulder. “You know you know this song.”

Jesse doesn’t really know it all that well, mostly just bits he hears when his older sister’s home from college and takes control of the car stereo. Something about Dr. Evil and being cold or… something. Modern music makes absolutely no sense to him. (Like what does it mean to be “sicker than the guy with the thing on his eye” and why does the girl who sounds like she’s taken too much cold medicine find it necessary to tell a guy she likes his beard when she’s done with her song?)

It turns out it doesn’t even matter whether or not he knows it, because when the light turns green, Andrew launches into the chorus so loudly that the woman in the car next to them gives him a strange look and Jesse dissolves into helpless laughter.

In the night, I hear ‘em—Jess!” And now Andrew’s snorting with laughter at his own expense. “You’re horrible. I bet I look like an absolute crazy person right now, singing alone, and I blame you.”

Jesse grins at him like they’re kids again. “Yes, because it was the singing alone part that made you seem crazy. The loneliness, that’s it.”

Of course that gets Andrew started on another song, one that Jesse regrettably knows.

“My loneliness is killing me, and I, I must confess, I still believe!”

Jesse may or may not be chiming in with a high-pitched “still believe!” when they pull up in front of his house, eyes wet and facial muscles strained from laughing so much. Andrew’s still snorting into his balled-up fist when Jesse reaches into the back seat for his backpack and blinks up at him.

“You remember where I live?” Jesse asks, quirking an eyebrow upward.

Andrew coughs his laughter away and shrugs like it’s no big deal. “Our mums used to take turns carpooling in junior high. I remember things about people I like.”

Jesse doesn’t even get time to overthink that statement because Andrew’s eyes flick past him, into Jesse’s yard.

[fill] rumour has it, 3b/?

“Looks like you have company,” he says, angling his head to look past Jesse. Walking toward them from an unfamiliar silver car is Emma, all long limbs and pale skin. She leans over so she can speak into the window.

“Hey, shitdick,” she says in Andrew’s direction.

“Hey, Emily,” he returns, making her scowl at him.

“Oh, fuck you, asshole.” Emma grins and pushes her hair out of her face. Her nose is mostly healed now, just a few patches of purplish bruise visible across the bridge and the tip, but it doesn’t seem to bother her because she crinkles it up a bit and looks at Jesse. “Jesse, can we talk?”

Jesse shrugs, hell why not, and gets out of the car with his backpack slung over one shoulder. He thanks Andrew for the ride and maybe lets the eye contact linger for a little too long because Andrew’s eyes are a nice shape and color and he appreciates that. No other reason. Really.

He and Emma wave from the driveway while Andrew pulls away before Emma stares at him with big eyes full of intent. “Can, um. Can we go inside?”

Jesse nods and reaches into his pocket for his house keys while they walk to the door. “How do you even know where I live?” he thinks aloud.

Emma lets out a small snort. “Joe said once that you were Patrick’s neighbor. I figured your house would be the one with the cat sitting in the window.”

Lo and behold, when they step inside, Figaro leaps down from his perch on the windowsill and mewls, winding his way around Jesse’s ankles and nearly making him trip and fall into the couch. He’s lucky that nobody’s home to laugh at him for it, other than Emma, snickering behind her hand while she flops onto the edge of the sofa.

“I thought you had detention,” Jesse notes as he settles into the armchair across from her.

“Amazing what a couple of faked period cramps can get you out of,” Emma says smugly, reaching her fingers out so Figaro can sniff them and hop into her lap, purring. “I was going to offer you a ride, but you were too busy making googly eyes at Andrew. The hell, man, you told me you two didn’t make out!”

“We didn’t!” Jesse refutes, scandalized.

“You’re kidding me,” Emma says amusedly. “The sexual tension between the two of you is palpable. It’s a little nauseating, to be honest here.”

Jesse shakes his head. He should not be thinking of making out with Andrew when he’s sitting here with someone. Or ever. Because he totally does not think of making out with Andrew when he’s alone or anything. Never ever, nope, not Jesse.

(Though, for the record, solely for the purposes of, like, science or whatever, dream-Andrew would be a great kisser.)

Emma scratches her fingers across Figaro’s back, grimacing when he shoves his furry black and white behind right in her face because Fig is not a normal cat. Jesse theorizes that Kerri or Hallie dropped him on his head when he was a kitten because no average cat thinks rubbing his ass against your face is a sign of affection.

Anyway,” Emma begins, drawing out the word so that Jesse knows there’s something potentially not-fun attached to it, “Brenda Song’s having a party tonight because her parents are out of town and they just installed a slide in her pool.”

Jesse scrunches up his eyebrows and blinks at her, knowing what she’s implying but pointedly ignoring it because he’d rather spend the weekend singing showtunes to Figaro again than spend it in a house full of obnoxious drunk kids. “Yes. Yes, that is a sentence with words.”

[fill] rumour has it, 3c/?

Emma rolls her eyes, annoyed in a way that Jesse previously thought was impossible with a fluffy, demonic, adorable ball of fur rubbing up against your hands. They’re even more freakishly large than usual, bluish green in this lighting, infinitely intimidating.

“I have made bigger men than you cry before,” she threatens.

Jesse smirks at her. “I’m just saying. You said a sentence. There was no question attached, and you can’t count on me to pick up on your implications.”

Emma lets out a mixture of a sigh and a groan, completely exasperated. “You’re going to Brenda’s party with me. Tonight. You and me, together.”

Thoroughly confused, Jesse blinks at her. “Is Carey going to be there or something?”

“Car—Er. No. Hence the ‘together’.” Emma looks up with these almost sorry eyes that puzzle the hell out of Jesse.

He furrows his brow. “You just told me on Monday that you liked girls. Specifically Carey.”

“I do, I mean—I just—I.” Emma looks more uncertain and scared than Jesse’s ever seen her, refusing to make eye contact and folding her arms over her chest. Figaro curls in her lap, pressing his face to her leg almost soothingly. “I thought maybe if we showed up together, they’d leave me alone.”

She doesn’t dare to look up or clarify, but Jesse knows what she’s talking about. He remembers the way the entire asshole population of the school seemed to specifically seek him out to tear him down, call him every offensive name they could think of. He didn’t let it get to him then, but he knows Emma well enough to know that they’re different in how they handle these things. He’s his biggest critic, so anything bad someone can say about him, he’s likely already thought it. Emma, on the other hand, is not someone who does well with the thought of people disliking her, as she shouldn’t have to because she is genuinely good behind her tough act.

Jesse crosses the gap between his armchair and her corner of the sofa and sits next to her. He pats her knee, a little awkwardly, to be honest, but smiles at her genuine as ever.

“Yeah. I, uh, sure. If it’ll get them to stop being assholes. We can, y’know, go to the party, be a little touchy-feely, shut them up.”

Emma looks up at him finally, a smile painted across her features, and squeezes her arms around his neck.

“You’re awesome,” she says, then makes a high-pitched yelp as she pulls away, glowering at her lap. “And your demon cat just clawed the motherfuck out of my leg.”

Re: [fill] rumour has it, 3c/? - xbriyeon, 2012-04-08 01:13 pm (UTC)(Expand)
Re: [fill] rumour has it, 3c/? - rrrg, 2012-04-08 03:45 pm (UTC)(Expand)