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The Social Network: the kink meme!

It's Complicated: But sexy!

zuckonitkinkeme zuckonitkinkeme wrote in tsn_kinkmeme
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sorry about the delay in getting this up! please put all new prompts here.




IMPORTANT: please DO NOT post prompts about any non-public people as part of a prompt. for example: randi zuckerberg is fine as she is a public figure both on the internet and on facebook itself. priscilla chan is NOT as she is not a public figure.

if you're in doubt, please message the mod or leave a comment in the discussion post.

♥ post requests and responses in the comments to this post.
♥ be respectful.
♥ both a pairing/character AND a prompt/kink must be posted.
♥ one pairing/prompt per comment please.
♥ you are encouraged to try and write a prompt for every request you make.
♥ we are slash, femslash, het, three-and-moresomes etc. friendly. (we are even incest friendly what with some of our characters being twins and all...)
♥ no pairing bashing, OK? no need to wank over ships.
♥ long and short fics welcome. multiple responses encouraged!
♥ please try to refrain from saying 'seconded!' as much as possible.
♥ on RPF: Please disclaim that it is RPF, a work of fiction and in no way related to the actual actors/persons/etc. (i wouldn't even try and discourage RPF from this meme ;))


♥ alphabetize pairings/threesomes/moresomes. (e.g. Eduardo/Mark/Sean etc.)
♥ put [RPF] before RPF prompts. (e.g. [RPF] Andrew/Jesse)
♥ for crossover prompts: "[Crossover], The Social Network Character(s)/Other Character(s), [Fandom]" (e.g. [Crossover], Eduardo/Columbus, [Zombieland])
♥ no "!" in pairings, only in descriptions. (e.g. Eduardo/Mark, FacebookCreator!Eduardo, CFO!Mark)
♥ anyone, everyone, no one? Use "Other." (e.g. Sean/Other)
♥ put [GEN] before GEN prompts.


♥ please don't embed. link to images/videos.
♥ no locked material. this includes communities, even if membership is open.
♥ fills can be posted anonymously or not.
♥ fills can be anything: fic, art, vid, fanmix, podfic, etc.
♥ all prompts are open to fills at all times, even if they have been filled in the past or are being currently filled by someone else. multiple fills are positively encouraged; if something appeals to you then do not be put off creating a new fill by the existence of a prior one.
NEW: ♥ PLEASE comment with the first of your fill to the PROMPT and then all future updates as a comment to the FIRST PART of the fill. this makes it easier for both the WIP spreadhseet and for archiving stuff on delicious. it also helps people who are trying to catch up on updates and don't have to look through every fill on the prompt (should it have more than one). thank you.






have fun!

THERE WILL BE UNMARKED SPOILERS. enter at your own risk! :D


i know you guys are enjoying this meme and i appreciate that but please can you put the SUBJECT HEADER on your prompt. you would REALLY be helping me out if you could do that. it just saves time for me when i'm trying to tag everything in delicious.

AND PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE DO NOT repost prompts from parts three, four, five or six over here again. the delicious is around for people to find prompts they may not have already seen. (prompts for parts one and two are now up for reposting.)




Upon hearing about how Mark and Eduardo had a big fight in the hallway from Dustin, Chris flies out to Palo Alto intent on forcing them to work out their issues. When just talking about it in a calm, rational manner won't work, Chris decides to take extreme measures. So he handcuffs them to each other until they learn to communicate, damn it!

fill - quelqu'un ma dit 1/?

i have no idea. i'll try to finish this before i go on hols but first i have to figure out where i want it to go. please dont hesitate to fill this

"Mark, come on I have to take a dump"

"What? Wardo, that's—"

"Don't call me—nevermind. How do we do this?"

"I've seen you sleep on your own vomit"

"But you've never seen me take a dump"

"Guess I will now?"

"I hate Chris"

"You're telling me"

The thing is, though, they could have prevented this. Or something. They should have listened to Chris when he warned them of it but, well, why would they take I'm going to handcuff you together, so help me seriously? This is Chris we're talking about. The guy who literally oozes maturity (or pretends to in public, Mark thinks snidely), so he was probably exaggerating.

Except he was not.

Not right now when they've been cuffed for more than five hours, done trying to reason out with Chris who just stood over where they were sitting on the sofa with a stern expression on his face.

"Why don't we just use a pin on the lock?"

"The cuff isn't computerised, Eduardo"

"Wh—I meant an actual pin, jesus, you really have become a robot"

Well that certainly isn't something Mark would have expected his best friend to say to him, you're going to get left behind or no. Mark resolutely does not care.

"No, if he finds us he'll ruin Facebook"

"Mark, I don't give a shit about—" Eduardo trails off after noticing Mark's jaw tighten. "—whatever, I need to take a dump"

"Do it then"

"Okay then stand the fuck up"


"Mark, I'm going to shit on you if I have to"

"You're disgusting"

"You smell like you have a ball of fart surrounding you, asshole. Now get up or I'll drag you"

Mark does and tries not to stomp his feet like a kid as they make their way to Mark's private restroom.

fill - quelqu'un ma dit 2/?

"Are you done yet?" Mark bites out, holding his breath and trying to hold his right arm with his left so it wouldn't get any more numb that it already has whilst dangling from the opened door of the shower stall to give Eduardo a poor excuse of privacy. "When have you last taken a dump, it smells like something died in your large intestines"

They try to ignore the ominous plonking sounds echoing from the porcelain.

"I slept at the airport," Eduardo hisses as if that explains everything.

"Airports have bathrooms"


"Why didn't you just—"

Eduardo cuts him off with a loud "Would you stop talking to me while I'm shitting!"

They hear Dustin bark out a laugh from the other side of the door.

"Dustin, get out of my room or my life and take that dutch milkmaid with you!"



"Er— could you hand me the toilet paper"

"Fuck my life"

fill - quelqu'un ma dit 3/?

"Okay, Mark and Saverin," Sean says the moment they step out the bathroom. He has a small chainsaw with him. "Let's do this"

"Where did you get that?" Mark asks the same time Eduardo says "let's go".

"Eduardo," Mark hisses. "We're not going to risk Chris's psychopathic need to fix everything that falls under the category of not his business"

"I can't stay here, Mark"

Mark hears not with you attached to the end of the sentence.

"Well whatever, you're staying."

Eduardo is talking to Christy every hour. It grates on Mark's nerves. And his right hand is twitching to type. Look, Mark is left-handed but he needs his right hand as much as he needs his left and his right hand is currently flopping uselessly to where Eduardo is holding his phone to his ear. Why he doesn't use his right hand instead of left is lost on Mark.

"I know, baby," Eduardo coos like he is actually listening and not reading The Economist like really is. "I miss you too"

Mark seethes.

"So while we're toiling here, you're up in New York getting your dick polished by Christy" Mark states in monotone when Eduardo finally drops the call fifteen interpreted code compilation later.

Eduardo sighs like he's exhausted of Mark "What is your problem?"

Mark is suddenly exhausted of him too.

fill - quelqu'un ma dit 4/?

"Dinner's ready!" Chris hollers a little mockingly from outside of the bedroom door Mark locked when he managed to make Sean get the fuck out earlier.

His hand twitches from where he's typing. "Go to hell"

"You're jewish"

"I will create hell myself just so I could roast you in it"

Eduardo groans from where he passed out next, drooling next to Mark's thigh.

"Dinner!" Chris repeats obnoxiously.

"Later" because Eduardo looks like he needs some rest.

They have a very late dinner comprised of KFC and Mark enjoys KFC as much as the next college dude so he's mauling a chicken.

Eduardo hands him the gravy as Mark hands Eduardo the mashed potato. Chris and Dustin are both eating next to them on the sofa as they watch a rerun of Shark Week (on Chris's insistence because okay assholes, I flew here for you, dibs on EVERYTHING. Everyone is afraid of Chris now that they know of his ability to manage Mark.). The interns though, the interns are staring at each other then staring at them then back again.

"What?" Mark asks a little defensively after he reached over and picked the spiciest chicken in the bucket knowing it's Eduardo's favourite.


Eduardo wipes the corner of Mark's lip with a napkin a few minutes later.

Mark's used to it. Mark's used to a lot with him, Chris, and Dustin. He thinks nothing of it.

"Wardo, wake up, we have a meeting," he whispers after seeing the clock on his computer flash five thirty. Mark nudges Eduardo's face with the thigh it's pressed against. "Wardo"

Eduardo blinks up groggily. "What? What time is it?"

"Five thirty. Get up, we have a second meeting with a potential investor at 7"


"Thiel!" Mark repeats, irritated and endeared at Eduardo's morning disorientation. He slides down the bed and drags Eduardo with him. "I told you about him, remember?"

"I didn't set up any meetings with Thiel," Eduardo states a little confused as Mark tries to figure out how to look at least a little decent. He needs this investment.

"Sean set it up for me"


"Wardo, just get up, we're going now"

"How do we shower?"

"How do we get out of our clothes?"

Eduardo sighs. "Okay, fine, no showering"

fill - quelqu'un ma dit 5/?

LOL IRL THAT WASN'T EMBARRASSING AT ALL. Thank you to happygravedigga and theroseofbattle. I'm going to sit in a dark corner and cry now lololol

"Is this the elusive Mister Saverin?" is what Thiel greets them with when they walk in the door. They decided to leave Sean in the car, much to Mark's amusement over Eduardo's incredibly impressive reasoning skills on the pros and cons on why Sean absolutely must stay in the car.

"Good morning, sir," Eduardo greets, extending his hand like he's been in the business for years. "It's nice to have finally met you. Please excuse our clothes, we're a little... attached."

Peter Thiel eyes the cuffs amusedly before barking out a laugh. "Oh, Mister Saverin, the first time I met with Mr Zuckerberg he was in sweatpants. I stopped judging his clothes after seeing what his mind is capable of doing."

Mark is too busy trying to hold in his pee to give a fuck about pleasantries. "Can we just get this over with?"

Thiel shakes his head fondly. "Alright. Come in, boys."

"Welcome to Silicon Valley. Try not to get fucked over by anyone."

Eduardo lifts the corner of his lips up looking predatory. "You too."

"I have to piss."


"Will you quit trying not to look at my dick? It's distracting!"

Eduardo makes an affronted noise from next to him. "How is trying not to look at your dick distracting?"

"Because it feels like you have a reason to be uncomfortable with it!"

"I'm sorry, what part of I'm binded to the wrist with you while you are about to touch your dick to pee not uncomfortable?"

Mark shrugs. "I've seen all of you naked in Harvard."

"I haven't seen you pee"

"And until yesterday I haven't seen you take a dump"

The man washing his hands on the sink behind them quickly closes the faucet and leaves.

Thiel walks them out to the lift and gives them both a leery smirk.

"Wardo?" Mark starts as they watched the light descends floor by floor.


Mark tilts his neck to meet Eduardo's eyes. He can't stop smiling. "We did it."


Eduardo looks amazing when he smiles.


Re: fill - quelqu'un ma dit 5/?

Haha, you're welcome!

I mean I track the whole kinkmeme, I should be the one hiding in shame. xD

But I love you and your fills, so now I can feel like I've contributed to it.
So, thank you for making this gravedigger even happier. :) ♥

fill - quelqu'un ma dit 6/?

Sean welcomes them back with a panicked "did you get it? If you didn't get it, we're going to die because someone—" he shoots Eduardo a scathing look. "—froze the bank account."

It's kind of hard not to talk to someone you're literally attached to but Mark was never a talker anyway so whatever.


Mark wires in even more.

Chris scolds them after two days of complete silence on Mark's part. He is absolutely immovable from his perch in front of his ugly-ass brick of a laptop to the point where Dustin has to put Eduardo's food on a tray so Eduardo can eat without risking accidentally slitting their wrists.

"Okay seriously, the point of the cuffs is for you two to fucking work your shit out."

Mark honestly did not hear him the first time so he's a little surprised when someone yanks his noise-canceling headphones away.

"What?" He grunts, blinking from the hours he's spent staring at the screen.

"You both stink"

Mark resolutely does not look at where Eduardo is currently sitting precariously at the edge of the sofa Dustin dragged next to Mark's table so Eduardo won't end up sitting on the floor.

He pulls at the cuff on his wrist, angry red lines on his skin. "Then remove it."

"I told you, I'll ruin Facebook"

"No, you won't"

"Yes I wi—"

"You know," and Mark can feel a jolt of anger shooting up and down his spine. He doesn't even need to stand up because he feels like he's going to do something awful (but the real reason is he doesn't want to yank at the cuff more) "I would appreciate it if for one minute, people who claim to know what's best for me and my company would actually listen to me. Just once."

"I don't work for you," Chris hisses after a moment of complete shocked silence.

"You work for Facebook which, coincidentally, I'm CEO of."

Chris bends himself so he's eye level with Mark. "Mark, I am first and foremost your friend. Your CEO bullshit will come second to me. I will not remove this until you two sort your shit out"

"Well we're fucked then."

They try to shower that night.

They wordlessly helped each other scissor their shirts off and tried not to think about the after shower would entail.

Mark sits on the toilet bowl as his hands flop up and down with Eduardo inside the open stall. His hand is soaked.

Then they exchange places.

They don't say anything.

Well, Eduardo tries to but Mark doesn't even bother to shrug.

They end up just deciding to go shirtless instead of dealing with t-shirts and button downs.

At four AM in Mark's room, Mark manages to wire out and notices that Eduardo looks just about as uncomfortable as a tall person trying to sleep on a small one-seater sofa with his hand attached to someone else.

He taps Eduardo's hand with his.

Eduardo snores on.

Mark thinks about role-reversals as he pulls Eduardo up with him, barely carrying their weights. He twines their fingers together because it feels easier.

When they finally reach the bed and when Eduardo is finally properly tucked under the duvet, Mark finally notices that his laptop is not with him and he would have to fucking maneuver both of them again to get it from his table.

He curses.

They both get to sleep that night.

Re: fill - quelqu'un ma dit 6/?

"Go to hell"
"You're jewish"
"I will create hell myself just so I could roast you in it"

made of win xD